What
People Are Saying About
Why Don’t They Just Quit?
“I read all of my Al-Anon books, attend meetings, and I have a wonderful church family, but this book presents some new thoughts to me. It’s wonderful and has proven to be of great solace. . . . as if you’ve been here in my home, observing.”
—Rosemary L., Anderson, Indiana
“[This book] will be valued by many, many people. A very meaningful gift of God’s grace to families who need sanity in the middle of their runaway insanity.”
—Mike Richards Jr., Director of Recovery Ministries, International Bible Society
“My association with The Salvation Army for over forty-nine years, allows me to confirm the importance of Joe’s practical approach to addiction and recovery.”
—Lt. Colonel Clarence Harvey, The Salvation Army, Kansas City, Missouri
“…stayed up late last night reading it; inspiring! This book is for people like me; with chemically addicted people in their life . . . one of the most clear/helpful guides to learn how to navigate the confusion, drama and pain associated with addiction in a family. Passionate, humble, full of wisdom . . . a must read for the addicted and those who care about them.”
—Donna Schwartz, MFT, CAC III, Valley Hope Treatment Services in Colorado
“Solid, helpful and hopeful . . . as a Pastor who deals constantly with those heartbroken by addictions and as the son of an alcoholic parent, I highly recommend Why Don’t They Just Quit? to others inside or outside a community of faith. Joe knows that his sobriety didn’t come just on his own strength, but through the power of a dynamic relationship with Christ, his “higher power” often mentioned in AA.”
— Rick Bundschuh, author, cartoonist and pastor of Kauai Christian Fellowship, Kauai, Hawaii
“Articulate, ‘real-world’ practical, thoroughly ‘user friendly’ and strongly recommended.”
—James A. Cox, Editor-in-Chief/Midwest Book Review
“I absolutely could not put the book down! It was amazing to me that someone could write something that I had lived with almost to the T. It gave me understanding from a different perspective, enlightening me to different ways of seeing the disease. It saved my sanity.”
—S. Chism, Maui, Hawaii
“I know Joe and he has immense personal credibility to address the confusing, complex issue of addiction. This book is surprisingly clear, crisp and candid. Many in our congregation, community and nation need to read what Joe has to say.”
—Alan Ahlgrim, Lead Pastor Rocky Mountain Christian Church, Niwot, Colorado
“Just got my book. I’m previewing it and hit a, “Thank you, Lord!” moment when reading about raising the bottom. I’ve wondered about that idea for some time now, but couldn’t seem to find professionals nor support groups who I felt were smart enough to answer my questions. Bless you all for putting out these resources!”
—Robb B., Pineville, North Carolina
“Many reading this book are facing the battle of your life. Alcohol and drugs consumed my daughter’s life. I can’t put into words—the anguish of attending my daughter’s funeral. I wish I had this book long ago. Maybe Mia would still be here. I didn’t know how to help her. Why Don’t They Just Quit? is full of answers I could have used.”
—Pam M., Niwot, Colorado
“…a must read not only for families of addicts and alcoholics looking for answers, but for anyone who has been intrigued by irrational compulsions and wondered how recovery takes place. I consider Why Don’t They Just Quit? to be one of the top five recovery books for families and I anticipate it being widely used by treatment programs throughout the country.”
—Nicolas Taylor, Ph.D., National Expert on the Treatment of Methamphetamine Addiction
“…I read your book twice. I thought I knew quite a bit about alcohol addiction but in reality, I probably only knew 20% before reading your book.”
—C.H., Denver, Colorado
“Joe writes with authority and clarity . . . . Its straightforwardness and intimacy as well as its lack of pretense give it a veracity, that is genuine . . . an excellent read for family and friends as well as the recovering person.”
—James W. Russell,
M.D., FACP American Society of Addiction Medicine
former director
of Founder’s Hall Treatment Center, Seabrook, New Jersey
“Joe explains addiction and recovery in terms we all can understand. We recommend it to all the families at our center.”
—Lee Barchan, Executive Director, Transitions Recovery, North Miami Beach, Florida
“As a recovering person myself, I found this book to be full of facts useful in sharing with visitors at our weekly meetings. I especially appreciate that Joe included the spiritual part of recovery and most importantly, the underlying message that anyone can recover—bringing hope to those seeking direction.”
—Vicki Beatty, Celebrate Recovery Leader, Covenant Chapel, Leawood, Kansas
“Everyting you’ve always wanted and needed to know about addiction and recovery is explained clearly and honestly in this amazingly compassionate, yet straightforward book. If you know someone who is struggling with addiction and don’t know how to help them, read this book. All the answers you seek are here.”
—Michael Z, M.A., author, The Wisdom of the Rooms, A Year of Weekly Reflections
“…a very good read. Joe effectively draws together much of the wisdom from AA and Al-Anon’s 70-plus years of experience, the hands-on lessons from professional counseling and the more recent medical advances in the treatment of addictions. His counsel and advice, while based on complicated problems with no easy answers is very practical and down to earth.”
—Dave Ketter, LCP, Clinical Supervisor/Valley Hope Association
“…vital advice, procedures and hope…This book offers workable, detailed solutions, with answers to common questions about this problem and offers hope to family and friends. A unique work providing new insights.”
—Lightword Publishing Book Review
“There is a tug-of-war going on in the recovery community between those with academic letters behind their names and those who have walked through the tunnel of addiction. For example there are those who believe AA is a positive road to walk, while others scorn AA for any number of reasons. Joe writes and talks about addiction with a warmth and depth of understanding that so many others lack. . . . superbly written, a straight-talking, no frills guide.”
—Ned Wicker, Addiction Chaplain and Host/Recovery Now! Radio
“Reading this book during the time I was married to an addict would have saved me many days of suffering and stress. Anyone close to an addict should read Why Don’t They Just Quit?”
—Marilyn Russell, RN, Boulder, Colorado
“Joe combines a lifetime of personal and professional experience dealing with this issue in a practical and highly personal overview. The book is excellent. I wish I had read it a year ago.”
—Sheriff Joe Pelle, Boulder County, Colorado
“This factual, fascinating book offers compassion for family members, solid evidence-based information about the disease, answers to commonly asked questions, and most important of all, a sense that you are not alone. Joe’s faith and his descriptions of the role faith plays in recovery light up the pages to reveal the essential role of spirituality in recovery. This book is an important and essential resource for family members, teachers, court services personnel, counselors, treatment personnel, ministers, doctors, and anyone whose life is affected by alcohol and other drug use/addiction.”
—Kathy Ketcham, coauthor, Teens Under the Influence
“Your story has encouraged and helped me deal with my son’s addictions and has given me great peace as a parent. I no longer feel alone under a terrible cloud of guilt; my son’s choices have been his own and I as a parent have done all I can. I continue to love him, encourage him and, as far as possible allow him to make his mistakes. I can put away the guilt and the shame, pick up my own pieces and move forward.”
— Kathy C., Longmont, Colorado
“I’ve read several books and literature on alcoholism and this is my favorite. This book tells how to show the addict “tough love” and ways of “raising the bottom” while still loving them and never giving up hope that one day they will “get it.”
—Jessica P., Vacherie, Louisiana
“This is a book that when you start reading it, you can’t put it down. Joe is not telling you how to cure addiction, he is telling you pretty much what to expect and what not to expect. I read the book because of my son’s addiction. We didn’t think it was happening. It helped me to understand what my son must be going through and what to expect. It’s a book about real people. A “must read” for all.”
—Carla E., Marseilles, Illinois
“…more than the typical self-help book, this book is gritty, honest, and full of practical tips. I loved the myriad quotes sprinkled throughout from such diverse individuals as Mother Theresa, Winston Churchill, Mark Twain, Ozzie Osbourne, and Herzanek’s own family members. It is the intimate way in which the author shares himself that lends what could be “just another addiction recovery book” a fresh and hopeful voice. I recommend this for anyone impacted by the effects of addiction.”
—Julie McGuire, Associate Editor, The Internet Review of Books
“…one of the most valuable books I’ve ever read. Having a son with a severe alcohol/drug addiction, who’s been through more than one treatment program, I was desperately looking for answers—not hype or glitter. I consider Why Don’t They Just Quit to be my “Bible” on drug abuse issues. Mr. Herzanek lays it out in a straightforward way, using his and other’s personal experiences to clarify the how and why of addiction and recovery. . . a must have tool for anyone impacted by a loved one’s addiction.”
—Mari N., Burlington, Washington
“After painfully watching my sons struggle with addictions for 10 years and trying desperately to help them, to no avail, this book spoke to me in a manner that no other book on this subject ever did. I contribute Joe’s words, to my healing as well. My sons could relate to his book, and it gave them hope too. I recommend this book to anyone caught in the web of addiction—whether it be the addicted or the loved one of an addict.
—Janis P., Brookings, Oregon
“My daughter recently told us she had an alcohol and Vicodin addiction. I didn’t know where to turn. A friend loaned me this book and I could not put it down. I read it from front to back in one sitting. It was like all the answers I was asking in my head, were all answered. It was literally a lifesaver for me. I was pretty sure before I read the book that I couldn’t handle what was coming next for my daughter. After I read it, I didn’t feel so lost and hopeless.”
—Sandy T., Marseilles, Illinois
“Thank you, thank you . . . I’ve been struggling for years to encourage my husband to stop enabling our youngest son. Last weekend he ended up in jail again (thank God) and I took the firmest stand ever and finally convinced my husband to leave him there! Man, it was hard, but the neat thing is that while searching for info about “enabling” he found this book and finally got “it” that we should not bail our son out after reading your sections on enabling! I feel so empowered, not hopeless as before. God bless from Loveland.”
—Pat M., Loveland, Colorado
“A thoughtful, caring book written for the everyday person with an addicted loved one; very helpful when you’re alone and desperately hoping your loved one is safe because he isn’t home and you know he is out using again.”
—Karon W., Concord, North Carolina
“God bless you. Al-Anon and AA are a Godsend, but I have found other books to be very general and a little outdated with today’s times. Joe’s book has answered so many questions for me that I can relate to and put into practice.”
—D.B., Lakewood, Colorado
“I was truly touched by Joes’s struggles and the way he was able to help his son avoid the very same problems he experienced in early adulthood. Joe opens his life for everyone, helping parents and loved ones recognize warning signs and identify steps to begin the recovery process.”
—Michael W., Kansas City, Missouri
“This is a must read…a book about truth, commitment, consequences, and a belief that things can change. It describes the complexity of drug addiction and the scars it leaves, along with practical solutions that can be implemented today.”
—Magistrate Judge Tijani R. Cole, Ph.D., J.D., Boulder, Colorado
“…an informative book for anyone interested in how the disease of addiction manipulates and destroys individuals and all the people around them. It delivers a clear and real picture of recovery…a great gift for family, friends and employers as they struggle with their role in the addict’s life.”
—Frank Lisnow,
Executive Director of CeDAR, Denver, Colorado
Colorado Past
President of National Association of Addiction Counselors
“Joe’s book provides insights and solutions that are proven to work for recovery—not only for the addict but for the entire family system.”
—Tony Marquez, VP
of Business Development,
Pacific Coast Recovery Center, Laguna
Beach, California
Who has woe? Who has
sorrow?
Who has strife? Who has complaints?
Who has needless
bruises? Who has bloodshot eyes?
Those who linger over wine,
who go to sample bowls of mixed wine.
Do not gaze at wine
when it is red,
when it sparkles in the cup,
when it goes
down smoothly!
In the end it bites like a snake
and
poisons like a viper.
Your eyes will see strange sights
and
your mind imagine confusing things.
You will be like one
sleeping on the high seas,
lying on top of the rigging.
“They
hit me,” you will say, “but I’m not hurt!
They beat me, but
I don’t feel it!
When will I wake up so I can find another
drink?”
—Proverbs 23:29-35
Sooner or later
everyone sits down to a banquet of consequences.
—Robert Louis
Stevenson
Why Don’t They Just Quit?
What families and
friends need to know
about addiction and recovery
Joe Herzanek
Published by:
Why Don’t They Just Quit?
What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery
Joe Herzanek
Copyright ©2007,
2010 by Changing Lives Foundation,
Boulder, CO 80308
Second printing
(revised/updated): January 2010
First printing September 2007
Published by
Changing Lives Foundation,
P.O. Box 19197 • Boulder, CO
80308
www.ChangingLivesFoundation.org
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be produced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, on any other-except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without prior written permission from the publisher.
All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®.
Cover Design: Karen
Steenekamp • www.opn-dsn.com
Cover Photographs: Karen
Quinn
Interior Design: Judy Herzanek
Printed by Johnson
Printing, Boulder, Colorado
ISBN-13:
978-0-578-04119-3
ISBN-10: 0-578-04119-3
Disclaimer: This book
is not intended to provide therapy, counseling, clinical advice or
treatment or to take the place of clinical advice and treatment from
your professional mental health provider or personal physician. It is
up to the reader to investigate any healthcare physician regarding
mental or medical health issues. Neither the publisher nor the author
takes any responsibility for any possible consequences from any
treatment, action, or application of information in this book to the
reader.
Printed in the USA
Dedication
The right people were there for me when I needed help to push me toward recovery. During my most difficult times, my parents Joe and Gladys didn’t give up on me. I wouldn’t have blamed them if they did. I pushed them to the limit on many occasions. The same is true for my former wife, Vicki, and my daughter Jami. With time, patience and strength, we have restored our shattered relationships. I’m grateful for their forgiveness.
My wife, Judy, has kept me stable for over twenty-five years. It takes a unique person to live with me day in and day out. She is my best friend and love.
My three wonderful children Jami, Jake and Jessica have played important roles in my life. We have all grown up together.
Many years ago, when I first began this odyssey called life in recovery, the counselors at Valley Hope, my treatment center, were there for me at the right place and time. Experiencing their compassion firsthand was a defining moment in my life.
Ernie Simmons, Dick Lane, Steve Aikman, Bob Bennett, Ted Nissen, Russ Minary and Floyd Golf are just some of the men who gave me clarity when I needed it.
I am grateful to the many hundreds of men and women also in recovery, who had just the perfect thing to say when I needed it the most. I will always remember those of you who were willing to share your time, and a portion of your lives, with me. I’m blessed to have had all of you in my life. Your love and friendship, along with the strength I’ve found in my relationship with the Lord have brought me this far. I’m not at the end of my journey.
Acknowledgments
I want to thank my editors, David Hicks and Tracey Lawrence, for guiding me through this experience and making me sound good on paper. I’m also indebted to my wife Judy, who was locked in a house with me for many months, decoding my scribbles until the wee hours, and who had the patience of Job.
I am grateful for their organization, encouragement, and insights through each step of the process. In all honesty, without their help, writing this book would have been impossible.
Table of Contents
Foreword
Introduction
Part 1: Why Don’t They Just Quit?
Chapter 1
A Look at My
Life................................................................
3
Why write this book?
Chapter 2
Dying for a Cold
One................................................................
7
Why do we all take drugs?
Chapter 3
Good
Question!................................................................
11
Why don’t they just quit?
Chapter 4
Pick Your
Poison................................................................
15
Why do people have “drugs of choice”?
Chapter 5
Houston, We Have a
Problem!................................................................
23
How do you know when “use” has turned to “abuse”, and
“abuse” to addiction?
Chapter 6
Technology Meets
Dope................................................................
29
How has technology changed the world of drugs?
Chapter 7
Moving
On................................................................
33
Making peace with the past.
Chapter 8
Inside the Criminal
Mind................................................................
37
Is he an addict with a crime problem or a criminal with an
addiction problem?
Part 1 Overview: Key Points to Remember
Part 2: It’s a Family Affair
Chapter 9
None of Your
Business................................................................
49
Should you intervene or not?
Chapter 10
Siblings: The
Forgotten
Ones................................................................
61
How siblings get hurt.
Chapter 11
What’s Going
On?................................................................
67
Is addiction a disease or a moral failing?
Chapter 12
I Drink
Alone................................................................
73
Why is isolation a bad sign?
Chapter 13
Raising Kids in the
Twenty-first
Century................................................................
77
What did I do wrong?
Chapter 14
What’s Love Got to
Do with
It?................................................................
81
What works, what doesn’t, and why.
Part 2 Overview: Key Points to Remember
Part 3: All About Treatment
Chapter 15
Different Strokes
for Different
Folks................................................................
91
Does treatment have to cost a lot?
Chapter 16
One Step at a
Time?................................................................
101
Are twelve-step meetings really important?
Chapter 17
Step One: Don’t
Leave Home Without
It!................................................................
107
What’s the big deal about Step One?
Chapter 18
Pivotal Teaching
Moments................................................................
111
The “rock bottom” myth.
Chapter 19
Meth
Myths................................................................
119
Can meth addicts really recover?
Chapter 20
Payback
Time................................................................
127
What is withdrawal like?
Chapter 21
Getting the
Treatment................................................................
133
What do people do all day in treatment?
Chapter 22
Drugs: The Gift That
Keeps on
Giving................................................................
141
What should I know about hep-C?
Chapter 23
Least Likely to
Succeed................................................................
147
What are alternative treatments for recovery, and do they
work?
Part 3 Overview: Key Points to Remember
Part 4: Life in Recovery
Chapter 24
A Whole New
World................................................................
157
What exactly is recovery?
Chapter 25
Whole Person
Recovery: The
Mind................................................................
161
Can the mind be healed?
Chapter 26
Whole Person
Recovery: The
Body................................................................
167
What roles do nutrition and exercise play in recovery?
Chapter 27
Whole Person
Recovery: The
Spirit................................................................
173
Do we have to talk about religion?
Chapter 28
Pill for
Pill................................................................
179
Is it okay to take medications in recovery?
Chapter 29
Serotonin Rising
................................................................
183
How should you deal with depression in recovery?
Chapter 30
Relapse: Plan on
It................................................................
187
What to do if your loved one relapses?
Chapter 31
They’re
BAAaaack!................................................................
199
What should you do when he comes back from treatment?
Part 4 Overview: Key Points to Remember
Conclusion
Part 5: Q & A with Joe
How Can I
Tell?................................................................
213
• How can I tell if someone is an addict/alcoholic or just a
heavy user?
• How can I know if my addicted friend or loved one
is telling me the truth?
• Are passing out and blacking out the
same thing?
• If someone can stop using for weeks at a time,
they “aren’t”
an addict—correct?
Does It Have To
Be?................................................................
217
• Does an intervention have to be a surprise attack?
•
If both parents are addicts, does that increase the child’s chances
of addiction?
What Is
It?................................................................
219
• What does the term “pink cloud” mean?
• Isn’t
addiction just a willpower problem?
• Does relapse mean
failure?
• What is Methadone? What is harm reduction?
•
What is meant by a co-occurring disorder?
Is It
Okay?................................................................
225
• Is it okay for a recovering addict to smoke pot?
• Is
it okay for my teen to drink at home under my supervision?
• Can
I have alcohol in my home, or serve alcoholic drinks on
social
occasions?
• Is it okay to tell your kids about your past use?
How open should you be?
Should
I?................................................................
233
• Should I search my adolescent’s room?
• Should I be
concerned about medications in my own bathroom?
• Should I be
concerned when he talks about suicide?
I’m
Wondering................................................................
237
• Does everyone have to know?
• How can I show my love
without enabling?
• Is there a cure for addiction?
• Are
some people beyond hope for recovery?
• Why is addiction called
an “insidious” disease?
• What about babies born to addicted
moms?
• How does one respond to being offered a drink after
beginning
life in recovery?
How Can
They?................................................................
245
• How can a mother or father leave their kids because of
alcohol or
drug use? Don’t they love their kids?
Is It
True?................................................................
247
• Are most addicts in jail, homeless, or unemployed?
•
Does using drugs and alcohol change a person’s brain chemistry?
•
Is it true that the chances for relapse are greater—the younger
a
person is?
• Does heavy use of alcohol and drugs create
addiction?
• Is it true that the more educated a person is, the
less likely they are to
become an addict?
• Is it true that
the chances for addiction are greater, the earlier use starts?
Can It
Happen?................................................................
253
• Can someone develop a dependency problem later in life?
•
Can a person just cut down on their drinking?
Do You Have
To................................................................
255
• Do you have to believe in God to attend AA meetings?
•
Do you have to stop seeing all your old friends in order to recover?
APPENDIX A: Real Stories, Real People............... 261
APPENDIX B: Self-Test............... 279
APPENDIX C: Resources............... 287
Foreword
Our phone rings, and a woman I don’t know asks to speak with Joe. Her son is in jail with a DUI again, and she wonders what she can do to “help” him. Joe spends the next forty-five minutes talking to her.
As we are out running errands the next day, an old friend strikes up a conversation. She is concerned about her sister, who is coming to visit and who has a severe drug dependency problem. Joe listens intently and shares his thoughts. Later that same day, as we are getting ready to leave our bible study, someone from our church takes him aside to ask for advice about one of his employees. These encounters, which some might consider interruptions, give Joe great satisfaction and add meaning to his day. Wherever we find ourselves, he is always willing to offer support and empathy. After being married to Joe for more than twenty-five years, I am well aware of his amazing gift. In fact, it was one of the things that first drew me to him.
Joe has a unique way of explaining and simplifying the most complicated problems. People listen to him. Because he personally lived the addict/alcoholic life, he can identify with the condition and lifestyle of the addict. Because he went through a residential treatment program and now has over thirty years of long-term recovery, Joe can speak to people about hope, and testify that recovery is possible. Because my husband spent almost two decades counseling inmates in jails and prisons, he understands the criminal mindset. He knows what works and what doesn’t when it comes to addiction and recovery.
Not being afraid to tell people exactly what they need to hear, Joe will clearly tell a mother when her “helping” is actually making the situation worse. He has a keen ear. What seems to be the most hopeless, complicated situation for others has a clear solution for Joe. With wit and ease, he sorts through problems, paring them down to one or two basic issues—which almost always center on someone’s substance abuse.
I’m excited that Joe’s insights and advice are now available to those in need. I am a recovering person myself. Together we have gathered and answered some of the most common questions, concerns, and myths about substance abuse, recovery, and the role of faith in recovery. We’ve even added some new Q&A based on the many email questions we receive daily. This is a chance for people to receive clear, practical, no-nonsense information on this topic that can actually help them immediately.
Addiction is a serious disease, which naturally places a heavy burden on families. But Joe brings to this topic a positive outlook and a welcome humor—something you don’t normally expect to experience when reading about substance abuse! Although he lived through some very tough times, he managed to survive, and survive with his sense of humor intact. You may come across a funny story or quote and be surprised, since this book is about such a serious topic. What a great testimony to recovery, to be able to laugh again.
Joe speaks from firsthand experience, having survived shattered relationships, a life-threatening disease, physical and mental withdrawal, police problems, and raising two teenagers. He also shares his story of true recovery, restored relationships, renewed health, and spiritual growth.
Although Joe will never forget the serious lessons learned during his lifetime, he has worked through his past and moved on to a new life in recovery. As you read the following pages, Joe’s account of his personal struggle with addiction will show you the way to begin this journey as well. If you are a part of a family struggling with substance abuse, life doesn’t have to remain complicated and despairing. You and your family can begin a new life today. I’m confident that you too, will be able to laugh again.
—Judy Herzanek
Introduction
Congratulations! You have just taken a step toward helping your family member, friend, employee or loved one. The book you are holding in your hands is all about solutions, practical solutions you can use right now to start making positive changes in your own life and in the life of someone you care about.
Addiction—called America’s silent new epidemic by Larry King of CNN—may be one of the most mysterious problems in our nation today—with approximately one out of ten adults in trouble with alcohol and/or drug use. Although this problem has plagued us for generations, the past few decades have brought about a huge increase in its severity. New drugs and new technologies, enabling stronger addictions, are being developed as I write. An end to this problem is nowhere in sight. In fact, it appears to be getting worse with time. Controversy, myths, shame, stigma, ignorance, and confusion surround this serious topic, and the questions are endless: Is it a disease or a moral failing? What’s the cause? Who’s to blame? Is there a cure? Is it a self-inflicted wound or is it in my DNA?
You may have your own list of questions about recovery:
What can I do to help?
Is treatment necessary? And if so, what kind?
How can I afford it?
What happens in twelve-step meetings?
Do twelve-step meetings conflict with my faith?
How can I do an intervention with a rebellious teenager?
How do I survive going through relapse with someone?
Should I talk about this with my friends? What if they stigmatize and pass judgment on my loved one?
With so many theories and methods being offered today, how
can I know which theories are true, and which methods work?Why don’t they just quit?
After more than
thirty years of long-term recovery from drugs and alcohol, and
seventeen years of work as a certified addiction counselor in jails
and prisons, I can answer all these questions, and help you unpack
many other issues surrounding the problem of addiction. Through my
work with thousands of men, women, and family members struggling to
be free of the ravages of this disease, I’ve gained valuable
insights. The interviews I conducted on my Recovery Television
series, featuring experts in the addiction field combined with
substance abuse issues with my own son, continue to shape my life
message. This unique combination of personal long-term recovery,
parenting teens and counseling experience has given me a platform
from which I am able to relate to families and substance abusers from
all walks of life.
You probably have fears regarding what hardships will have to happen to someone you care about before he/she will wake up and change. Sometimes a little more knowledge on a topic can give you the motivation and confidence you need to move toward positive change. You are not alone in trying to face this problem—most families are affected at some level by this disease. Substance abusers may have jobs, families, or own their own businesses. They are students, professors, attorneys, employees, truck drivers, police officers, pastors, nurses, sons, daughters, spouses, mothers, and fathers. You may have a spouse, neighbor, co-worker or a teenager battling drug and alcohol abuse. These are real people, living with real families. Addiction is an equal-opportunity destroyer. It respects on one. It doesn’t care what level of education a person has. It is insidious. It may strike all at once, or it may slowly slither its way in.